It always hurts when you take your exit from the playoffs. It’s worse when your star player, Luongo has a very uncharacteristic performance.
Still, this season was far beyond my expectations. I barely expected to see the ‘Nucks in the playoffs, let alone get this far.
But until next year, I give you…
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To start this onslaught, I present to you the following rant from Canada’s [ahem] Second Greatest Living Canadian:
I can’t say this outburst surprises me. And before going there, I do have to say, in general, short of certain subtleties (and suit choices), I tend to agree with Cherry’s slant about hockey. I fully agree fighting is a part of the game and should be encouraged, if to serve as part of the entertainment along with lessening more serious injury caused via stickwork. But this rip on Ovechkin is nothing more than bias. Consider it this way.
Turn on sports news. Sports radio. Especially hockey. Especially now, considering how close we are to the trade deadline, and the frenzy final few hours prior to. With the addition post lockout of the salary cap, the subtext of almost every trade is money money money. Clearing cap space. Is this player worth that much. Rental or keeper? Resignable after this season? Dollars dollars dollars are in the forefront of the hockey talk for the next three days. And therein lies the rub.
With the complexities of a cap based revenue system in the sport of hockey, the true evil of greed sometimes can get lost in the mix of the bigger, team picture. For example, Alexei Kovalev, of my beloved Habs. Never have I seen such an indifferent shithead of a player. No real passion for the game. It is clearly evident that he is all about the Benjamins, and nothing else. The same could be said about Scott Gomez and Chris Drury, amongst others.
Now enter Ovechkin. Cherry says his antics are uncalled for. It’s over the top ‘entertainment’. I say this. Any serious in depth report on Ovechkin proves one thing. The kid just LOVES to play. He has pure passion for the game. Maybe, Don, just maybe, the ‘antics’ are not showmanship directed towards the fans. Perhaps it could be a genuine expression of his joy. In a game filled with money driven sell outs, I find a player like Ovechkin refreshing. Cherry, I fear you lost perspective a long time ago. Fuck me, your commentary, as your broadcast location, is Toronto-centric. Having been in America Jr. for quite some time in my life, two things are constant. First, the hockey is shit. Secondly, the environment, media, fan and team for hockey is not amped up like a contender. It’s more like a relaxed country club. And Don, you and your comments fit right in. Is it any reason Toronto is so horrible? They are geared much more for April golf, not the playoffs.
Still, it could be worse. Here, in every rainy Vancouver (okay, this winter has been unseasonably dry, but generally it rains) we’ve had to endure weeks of speculation as to whether or not Ohlund will waive his no trade clause. Can we re-sign the Twins? And now today, will we offer up Alex Burrows as trade bait (which, in not only my but every other Vancouverite’s opinion is an idea spawned from a Hastings and Main crack addict)? It gets tiresome. January was lynch Vinnie Vigneault month, as the Sundin signing was looking like a flop. February was Vigneault is a genius for putting Kesler with Sundin and Demitra and Burrows with the twins. And our sportscasters talk about nothing else. 21 hours a day (if you’re even more a vampire and night owl than myself) of the same, repetitive story. Just 9 AM to 12 PM as a break. Thank you Jim Rome for adding variety. Can’t Rick Ball talk about NCAA Hoops? Can’t Scott Rintoul stop being a pint sized geek and talk Major League Baseball? Fuck, we do have a former AL MVP from our parts (Justin Morneau). Rome definitely covered a more diverse athletic spectrum than our home grown ‘talent’.
Well, now Rome has been relegated to ‘another time slot’ that Team 1040 has not decided to announce (which probably means late night). All in the effort to ‘give us more Canuck hockey coverage that we asked for’. I don’t know about anyone else, but I asked for less. FAR LESS Canuck coverage, if what constitutes coverage is regurgitating the same two minute story ad naseum for 21 straight hours per day. Now we have Blake Price and Dave Tomlinson repeating the same, homogeonized stories in the time I’d rather hear Rome rip ‘John from Kansas’ or some other clone or clone wannabe. Hell, if the Team wanted some research, it almost seems the majority of Rome’s emails come from Vancouver. Listen and count.
Fact is, I bet the Team 1040 are ultimately appalled by one aspect of Rome’s broadcast. He speaks his mind, and bows to no specific authoritative power. No network mandate, no FCC bylaw. He lays the smack, and frankly, he tells it how he sees it. No other personality on the Team 1040 does that. And maybe there’s the rub. Where Cherry, the former Bruin coach and later supporter has turned coat to be a closet Leaf fan (among other closet habits he may or may not have come clean with yet), Rome won’t change his spots for the good of big business broadcasting. Though in Vancouver, it means he has a right shitty timeslot. One I will probably take a few weeks to figure out. But as for the Team, I can genuinely say this. I, along with all the Rome fans in Van will NEVER, EVER listen again between 9-12 until you fix this atrocity.
Yes Team 1040, you have been BLOCKED!
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Just a thought. Why won’t the NHL let Hamilton have a team?
Because Toronto will get jealous and want one too.
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Welcome to Toronto…
Home of the Leafs, and birthplace of Osama bin Laden AND his twin brother Jason Blake. Is there any wonder Mats Sundin wanted to leave?
Go Canucks Go!
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Welcome to Toronto…
The WORST place on Earth.
Go Canucks Go!
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Bah. Another drought in posting. Still, I’ve had much worse months. Aside from various personal issues, I haven’t had much fodder. Less one thing, and really attacking this in the slump really would be like kicking a dead horse. For those fellow hockey fans (read Peter and Ben), I’m sure they’ve noticed that the Canucks have had a less than stellar record as of late. Nine straight home losses, to be exact. It’s gotten so bad that I can’t listen to the Team for longer than five minutes after Rome goes off the air. Every armchair GM has their ‘thoughts’ about how to improve the situation. The answers are common, but the angst comes from a place like they expected this squad was going all the way to the cup. It is sad, that reality has no factor for the majority of ‘Nuck fans.
Bah. In response to all, I give you this open letter to Mike Gillis and Filet Mignon Vinny Alain Vigneault, or AV.
Hi Mike. Bonjour Alain. Before you start taking this to heart, I am not the typical demographic for a Canucks fan. I played as a kid growing up. I didn’t grow up in Vancouver, but rather most of my hockey days were in [sic] the armpit of Canada. I played in the cold. Simply put, I actually understand the game. I’m not a clone, a cylon, a borg who just chants ‘Go Nucks Go’ and expects the Holy Grail to make it’s way to our rainy streets, only to have my heart shattered yet again that we fell short.
On that note, guess what? We will again this year. Whether or not this crew will make the second season or not, well, that can be a debate on blogs and forums which we’ll all see come April. But the stark playoff truth is this. All roads will go through Detroit and San Jose. Our crew isn’t going to survive that path. Not without an act of the Gods this season, but possibly will do down the road.
Being that my whole family is from Montreal, we had to endure the latter part of the 90’s and the early part of this decade with really shitty renditions of les Glorieux. Alain should be quite familiar with that by now. He coached some of them. But now the Canadiens are a serious playoff contender. Why? They sucked so long they could draft, develop, and amass a great deal of young talent. Chicago did the same. In losing Naslund and Morrison, it was clear the direction was toward a youth movement.
Now, from what I remember from minor hockey, our coaches (the good ones anyway) actually kept the kids together for a number of games to allow them to develop chemistry. They didn’t juggle the lines every second shift because things weren’t working immediately. Alain, there is a lesson to be learned here. To wit, there are many things that are worse than having a rough few games while sticking out your best estimate as to the most feasible line combinations.
In no particular order,
Finding out your superstar has his face splattered all over the internet while he’s taking a big hit from a bong.
The Twins are arrested and convicted of running a cock-fighting ring.
Finding out Luongo is on steroids.
Having Luongo deny any use of said steroids.
Having the prosecution provide indisputable evidence that proves Luongo’s guilt.
Sundin could have a career ending injury prior to the end of the regular season.
Bieksa could retire from the league after having an extramarital affair with another player’s wife.
You could sign Sean Avery before the trade deadline.
You could juggle the lines so much you lose nine home games in a row, many games to weaker opponents.
Oh, wait, you already did the last one. Still, this is one of the best markets in North America for hockey. Do the fans a real justice. Bite the bullet for the next few seasons, let players gel, and build a contender in the future that will stay a contender for quite some time. And don’t think that splitting up Kesler and Burrows is going to get the latter to score a ton more.
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Four straight losses. Down six in the last eight. Definitely not the sign of a championship team. Well, so long as this lovely streak the Canucks are on continues. Tonight’s 4-1 loss to Winnipeg (held hostage in Phoenix, AZ for the last decade) was especially painful to watch.
What’s more painful is how the fans are reacting. Most specifically, the ones that call in to Team 1040. Fire Vigneault they say. Bench the coach. Trade Luongo. Sundin was a mistake. Cripes, if there was any weight behind any of the plethora of ideas to quick fix the Canucks, Mike Gillis might actually be worried about his job.
Luckily, this is the constant whinging of the ‘average’ Vancouver Canucks fan. Having lived and visited a great variety of Canada, it pains me to say that Canuck fans are almost as whiny and hockey-ignorant as the standard Leaf fan. Just as in New York Jr. Toronto, fans in Vancouver are Canuck fans more than hockey fans. Though in Vancouver’s defence, we’ll buck up and cheer a non-Toronto Canadian team in the late rounds of the playoffs.
Look at it logically. At the end of the season, Nonis is out, Gillis is in. Gillis lets the vets go and brings in youth, anchored by our superstar goalie, Roberto Luongo. To me, with a diverse experience in hockey, tells me one thing. We’re rebuilding. But unlike Toronto, it’s not COMPLETELY from scratch. But still, with rebuilding, I would like to tell Canuck fans out there:
It really means we won’t be a big playoff team for a couple of years at least. We must allow time for the team chemistry to develop and the youth to develop into the players and team they can be. Keeping that sentiment in mind, here’s my armchair GM rebuttal to all the village idiots in the GVRD who think they know more than Gillis.
1. The priority right now is to re-sign Bobby Lu. Period. Though we are rebuilding, we’ve gotta show him something in terms of post-season. He’s spent every year of his career, short one, NOT MAKING THE PLAYOFFS. If this rebuilding trend leads us to early April golf, kiss this all-star goalie goodbye.
2. In regards to point one, Sundin helps here two-fold. He gives us more scoring depth, which means the Sedins don’t have to face the strong checking lines every game, and opens up scoring. Our offense is anemic.
3. Sundin isn’t a quick fix. He’s older. It will take time for his stride to really hit. We must all be patient. I’d rather him score like a man possessed in March, not pushing himself too hard now and pulling an end to his career a la Doug Gilmour.
4. Vinnie Vigneault must be patient. Constant line juggling is retarded. You have a young team. Let them grow. Changing things each time you have a panic attack is killing our team.
5. Take that fucking A off of Mitchell’s jersey and give it to Boom Boom already. We’ve endured two Luongo-less months, and if one thing is obvious, it’s the lack of real, heart on your sleeve leadership. Bieksa and Burrows are the only two skaters who fit that bill. Hell, give Ohlund’s A to Burrows while we’re at it. We need to light a fire under their proverbial asses.
6. Bench Taylor Pyatt permanently until some team actually wants to trade for him. Fuck me, look how he plays. It’s like he’s straight from Timbit’s hockey. Why bench Wellwood to have Pyatt? Why not just go to a local rink and find a young kid to play with the Sedins each night?
7. Don’t fire a coach mid-season. Don’t bench a coach. Don’t trade Luongo for Lecavallier. Don’t release Sundin. Don’t… well, you get the point. It seems all of management’s moves are knee jerk responses to fan complaining. If you want to listen to us for one real useful thing, get the fuck rid of the pay-per-view nonsense.
/rant over.
Sometimes you gotta roll the hard six. Like tomorrow, the beginning of the end.
With this, nothing else need be said:
Canada wins 5th Straight World Junior Hockey Championship
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Imagine this. Celebrities who don’t have excessive drug and alcohol problems. NFL players who don’t feel the need to visit nightclubs with the intent to shoot people. PGA caddies who keep their pie hole shut. Major League Baseball players who don’t do ‘roids. It almost seems like a distant memory from times long gone. It seems people these days are far more interested in recreational antics than what our ‘celebrity’ is actually paid to do. Society is in reverse evolution. I’m just waiting for the day that people find the news in the supermarket tabloids more factual than our traditional papers.
Here in Vancouver, we have been blessed. Blessed to just see, let alone get to know [at least in some form] a throwback. Someone who is just as much a star off the ice as he is on. Trevor Linden. What is truly remarkable about Trevor is how his public life off the ice overshadows a GREAT career. There is no doubt Trevor was a fantastic player. But what he did off ice really takes presidence. In such a way that it has touched the lives of every SINGLE Canucks fan.
Unlike the status quo of the millennium, Trevor gave of himself. For the week preceding tonight, the airwaves have been saturated of stories where Trevor took the time for fans, for kids and adults alike, making a positive difference to everyone he came across. Personally replying to all fan correspondence. Visiting many a fan in the hospital. The list seems to be endless. He is a person who NO ONE could ever say a bad word. With every breath he gives of himself for the betterment of his team and his community.
If only more people could bring just a part of Trevor into their lives, we’d be much better off.
It is only fitting that tonight, the Canucks raised his number 16 to the rafters.
Congratulations Trevor. You will always be a Canuck.
Well, it’s just about over. Burkie finally signed with the worst team in the history of hockey. Full control in the self-perpetuated ‘center of the universe’. After telling a very obvious, bold-faced lie in the press conference stepping down from his post in Anaheim.
None of this is a shock at this point. Hockey fans everywhere saw that Burke was going to Toronto, adding another gong to the already insane gong show that is hockey in the biggest commercial hockey market in Canada. The sad part is when it’s all made official Saturday, it’s not the end.
It will just be the beginning. What a sad day for hockey, getting all that spin doctoring. So much for sports journalism ever being about the game on the ice anymore.
But, with spin doctoring and perception in mind, here’s the latest MCFAT:
1) Is it good or bad when sitcoms feature celebrity guest stars?
When I read this question the first time, the better question jumped in my head. Are there any good sitcoms out there anymore? As many of you already know, I really can’t stand the tripe the major US networks shove down our collective throats on a weekly basis. I guess I should have realized that television sitcoms are going the way of the dodo when I really started to get sick of the Simpsons about six years back.
About the only ’sitcom’ that works for me these days is really Family Guy. Period. Simply put, it is what The Simpsons dares not to be. So how does it stand when celebrity guest stars are on? Well, in the case of James Woods, brilliantly. Sadly, James must learn not to follow a candy trail down an alley and into a simple box trap. Git. As to other guest stars, it does seem that Seth McFarlane uses them with purpose, not JUST for a ratings grab.
The other shit that clutters the airwaves, however, seem to have no real creativity left in their premise or delivery. Celebrity guest stars, as a result, seem to be nothing more than a Paris Hilton-esque attempt to get mindless ratings during sweeps week. Still, based on all this tripe, the lowest common denominator mentality may actually improve the show. If I have some time I may do a comparative analysis at some point.
Maybe.
2) What is the most shocking thing you’ve seen on the internet?
Personal politics notwithstanding, it’s a toss up between this site and this site. In terms of all the fucked up, bizzare, vomit inducing images and viral videos out there, they start to lose their punch as we all have that friend who constantly emails all that sick shit all the time. Positively speaking, at least the onslaught builds up a heavy resistance.
Still, after even linking up that scum to my site, I need to cleanse. As such…
and this. The last game I got to see in the Montreal Forum:
Ahh. Now I feel better.
3) Is it possible to have too much free time?
Come on now. If there’s no such thing as a free lunch, how on earth can ANY time be free?
4) Inspired by a recent Dwight Shrute monologue, I ask you: what’s your perfect crime?
There can only be one perfect crime. Taunting those on the growing list of people who have not only pissed me off but have completely betrayed me, to harming me to such a degree that my murder of them can be justified as self defence.
SPECIAL BONUS QUESTION: What (animated) fictional town offers a whirlwind existence, race cars, lasers, airplanes, mystery-solving, time travel, and more?
Very simply put, the alternate 1985 New York City in which the former Crimebusters, of Watchmen fame are written to exist. Hell, anything is possible with the existence of Dr. Manhattan.
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