Number one sign you’re a dork/geek/nerd/whatever… you write a frakking post like this and use the word frak instead of fuck…

Though in that thought, I wonder if Moore and Eick ever considered what word to use in place of cunt? Or better yet, imagine Ricky giving a speech like this:

Frak this court. Frak Jim Lahey. Frak Randy. Frak those two idiot cops right there. Frak suit dummies; as a matter of fact frak legal aid. Frak Danny and Terry’s Buffalo Chicken Wings. Frak all the old wood in here. Frak the moon, frak corn on the cob, frak squirrels. Frak me, frak you, frak everything!

It still has the same punch for me. But again, thus is the life of being a dork. A geek. A nerd. Or any other fucking word to describe someone who is both intellectually gifted and a complete social outcast. The old man (not this old man) tells me I’m just an individualist. Nothing like another signpost to the increasing conformist nature of a freedom depleting society. 1984 here we come.

But anyway, enough politics for now. I’m still seething from the suspension of the Jeff O’Neil Show for buying heroin. Bah. They’re back on.

Rather, as we’re now less than 48 hours from the last new episode of Battlestar Galactica before the ‘writer’s strike’ episode hiatus, I better get to the business of what I was trying to get to last week (though I just had this little introduction).

Since this is obscenely spoiler and speculation heavy… continue on at your own risk.

It’s Been One Week

Full of asshats.
New boss is an asshat and is very angry.
Five days of near slavery,
Saying asshats galore, get the hell away from me.
Two days in the living room,
Another asshat comes, but this time was virtual.
Yesterday, I’d flamed her,
But it’ll be never before I say I’m sorry.

Not much changes in the world of me. My life’s a war, and for some fucked up reason, all the asshats gravitate towards me. I mean, come on, can’t these pieces of biological waste get a hobby or something?

This one, however, has. She seems to find people like me, who stand against America (for me, it’s simply the Americanization of Canada). She has, as you have now realized following the link, taken on a war against anti-Americanism (isn’t that just as futile as taking on a war against another concept, such as terrorism)? And just to show you where I stand (as it seems I’m highly misunderstood). America is fine. Within limits. For me, just south of 49 will do. And they can have Toronto to boot. I had a choice to live permanently there, but I chose to stay in the Great White North. Why? Health care and not living in a culture of fear were good reasons.

Not to say that America doesn’t have great strengths. I just want to enjoy Canadian strengths. Hockey. Beer. To put a defining point on my beef, take a full college or university program on Canadian Film studies. The lack of funding for good Canadian content is a real sore spot with me.

Still, this ‘person’ chose to hammer this post and the About Me page on here, prior to writing this post about how we Canadians are ‘insecure about our southern neighbours’. Now, instead of defaming her on this site, just read all the comments to see what a nutjob she really is. My favourite bit though still is these two points.

1. I got banned! Woohoo! Break out the champagne! Cocktails! It’s been a while since someone has blacklisted me from their blog. And I’d thought I’d lost my touch!

2. ‘Apparently’, my ass was handed to me. ‘Apparently’, I’m pissed. News to me. Time for another celebratory drinky poo!

And finally, in sheer celebration, my latest bobblehead:

So, from Darth Stewie unto you Candy/Virgo Monkey/flavour of the week girl, I say to you this parting phrase:

If you can’t take a joke, don’t be one.

Now for your airlocking:

Interdum vos ut volvo ferrus six.

P.S. Grow my city’s industry.

Somewhat of a personal update

Odd I know. I don’t get into the bizarre world of myself often. But I haven’t been consistently posting, and I’ve just felt off, so maybe a little airing and cleansing is just what I need.

Maybe.

Meh.

But for those of you who aren’t consistent readers of Dawn’s blog, a few changes are occurring in the lower mainland. And no, I’m not talking about the impending trade rumours surrounding Brendan Morrison. No, rather a few things.

First, Dawn and I adopted an 8 month old cat named Tara:

But, our landlord doesn’t allow pets. So as such, we’ve been frantically looking for a new apartment. Well, we’ve found one, and hopefully we’ll know tomorrow if we get it. It’s in Surrey, but luckily it’s in the south end, so we’re somewhat distant from the lot of crime that goes on.

Film production has slowed to a crawl, which has forced me to look for a job to carry me through the winter. And let’s just say Best Buy just doesn’t fucking cut it (based at least on rate of pay) this winter. Something looks really good this winter, and fingers crossed, we’ll have some money, and most importantly

I’LL BE ABLE TO FUCKING SKI THIS WINTER!!!

HOOOO WAAAAH!

And I also have a confession. I really like the new Battlestar Galactica. Yes the new one. For those of you who know me (or think they know me) well, I almost always abhor of remakes. Though there is this one bit… the remake has to add something of artistic value. Battlestar is one of very few remakes which does just that. I like the cinema verite (documentary) camera style. The grittiness. Eastern expressive camera use. And an in your face approach to the story. I’ve been studying it a lot, as I realize that feature films may not be a viable venue for a career as a director (well, a director who wants to express themselves, not be a slave to corporate propaganda). Television may be the direction things go, now with piracy, HD television, more intrinsic, detailed stories, et al.

Aside from me, it seems Harper and the Conservatives are a bunch of lying liars. What a shock. I could go on, but Rick Mercer capures it perfectly here. Liberal government here we come!

Oh yeah, and our differently brained neighbours down south had some kind of an election yesterday. Meh.

That is all.

*UPDATE*

Since Dawn definitely likes to take the piss out of me with regards to Starbuck, and in response to her post showing gratuitous pictures of Shawn Michaels, I give you Lt. Kara “Starbuck” Thrace:

That is all.

Five Years

And it still feels like yesterday. Five years since the day that changed everything. Let us never forget the terrible tragedy that befell our neighbours to the south.

That is all.

Nothing much to say

I haven’t been posting the last few days. Meh. As from my previous post, I have given notice to Best Buy, so that my availability for film dramatically increases. Also, bearing in mind the economics of the Vancouver film industry in the winter (ie that there really isn’t any work for someone as low on the totem pole as myself), I’m also gearing for my OFA Level II (well minimum, level III afterwards depending on circumstances), flagging (so I can PA on the side as well), and forklift (as this will help to also apply to the Construction department at IATSE).

You see, upon leaving the IATSE office last Wednesday (has it been a week already), I refound (is that a word) charge for film. The door was open. Then the following day I went to Best Buy. And the big blue box tapped all the energy out of me. Though I have recovered from it, the economic situation still is gripping. I have yet to fully recover from the trip up to Quesnel (that is financially). To which I find it mirrors the bane of my existance. Does money always have to corrupt art? Being in a state of flux until I go full tilt back in IATSE, one would figure the creative juices toward writing (both on this blog and screenplays) would work. I even have sources of inspiration. Consider this:

I worked with a guy last week (on the temp labour front), who, through a highly irritating conversation, found out he hasn’t worked an eight hour day in YEARS. And I don’t mean 2-5. Try 10-15. Easily. He also wonders why nobody hires him. He’s fixated on Disneyland in southern California, as the sole reason to travel there. Eventually, the truth came out.

He’s forty years old. Unemployed. And lives with his parents. He makes George Costanza look successful. Chris Peterson (from Get a Life) hardworking. And Seymour Skinner like he has a life.

But I shouldn’t beat up on the lad. Though I will say such a character has not inspired me to write fully about him.

God I hate this funk. I need my groove back.

That is all.

Someone out there likes the cut of my jib

And after a month of my posts drawing heated attention from “the right”. Yes, those fine people who politically support parties like the Republicans or the new “Conservative Party of Canada”. If you want details, just simply read the last 30 or so days worth of posts. But this post is not about any of that.

It actually seems that there are some who think there is some merit to the liquified drivel that pours out of my mind, through my fingers and keyboard and thus on these blog posts. Wooo hooo! It seems someone over at Best Blog (please note this is not Best Buy) who made this post, which briefly summarized me as “funny, a fine writer, speaks his mind, and is knowledgeable about his topics…”.

Well, I do thank the crew at Best Blog for giving me a simple, but positive review. It is a refreshing change. They do review a fair number of WordPress blogs floating out in the blogosphere. Though one question does ring in my head? How on earth did these guys (and gals) find me? Was it by fluke they surfed by? Or has somebody been quietly reading my blog, and finally was inspired to review my tripe?

Either way, I do feel honoured for the review. If others out there have something nice to say, please, DO NOT HESITATE.

That is all.

It just may

finally be time to give the crotch chop to a certain retailer.

More to follow soon.

SUCK IT!

It’s a small world

Ever since moving out to Vancouver, I’ve become increasingly aware of increasing, too close to home coincidences that continue to occur.

Consider the following:

1. On X-Men: The Last Stand, I worked with two other lamp operators, named after a late friend of my father, the other after our (now former) Prime Minister, Paul Martin.

2. My renewal date for my vehicle plates are the same date as my mother’s birthday.

3. My best friend’s mother’s maiden name is the same as Dawn’s mother’s maiden name.

4. My mom, back in her hometown dans la belle province, lived on the same number and street there as the one man who works with my father full time now, out in Ontario.

Now, the most disturbing of all. The alumni of my parents high school are quite tight as a group, even though most have dispersed from Quebec and travelled mostly westward. Mom, relatively new to email and the net, ran across the email address of her old next door neighbour and close friend.

This friend lives not but 2-3 minutes from an establishment Dawn and I frequented very liberally before moving out west, Second Cup in Richmond Hill.

But even more freaky, her friend had an older sister (now passed on 15 years back), who, among other things, encouraged my mom to try tasting beer at a young age (to which she hated the flavour and never had another). Her friend’s sister’s name?

ALEXIS STEWART.

Good god. There has been another silk.

That is all.

The tides are turning

Well, as any of you who speak to me personally (well as it stands, mostly via MSN or Google Talk), I’m making my transition back to the real world of fiction filmmaking. But yet, I still remain at Best Buy in a part-time capacity for two reasons. One, as a fall back “just in case”, but secondly, and more importantly, to retain the ever important employee discount. Though it does me next to no good for the Mac I want to purchase, I can get a hell of a discount for a Home Theatre package, so I can watch Star Wars ad naseum in surround sound.

However, as now that maintaining 40 hours at Best Buy is no longer a high pressure issue for me, it does allow me to see the lighter side of things at the store. A wonderful, third side benefit of the store. Like yesterday.

Yes, a asshole of a wonderful customer, let’s call him Dickweed, bragging that he works in sales, came in looking for plasma TV, reciever, and speakers. And he came in with the attitude that because he’s spending so much, he should get, nay deserves a savings from the advertised and listed prices. And a free TV stand to boot.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Let’s look at the flaws in his argument.

1. We are NOT commission. Period. Most electronics retailers who do cut advertised prices are on a commission basis, where sales reps will cut their commission to sweeten a deal. Note that this is “sweeten” a deal, not acheive a sale. Only a weak salesman will cut the cost just to get the sale. Dickweed, who claims that he always cuts deals to get sales obviously just showed his strong front to his personality only masks his lack of confidence in his own abilities. And you tried to look down at me. I wonder what you sell… maybe weed?

2. Being non-commission, we are cutting the stores profits by cutting a deal. As such, in the rare instances managers permit a “deal”, they expect to still make money on the transaction. We were losing money on the TV and Reciever, but making a bit on the speakers. Throwing in a stand for free would have made the transaction cost the store money. Yet Dickweed felt special enough to deserve that. Sales is give and take. Where’s you’re give? Do you honestly believe you are the only person who spends more than $1000 in the store in the day? You’re so high on yourself, it sounds like you constantly stroke yourself in public. But yet you’re married. Has she cut you off for that long?

It seems that this man

Has more activity in a quarter of his cerebral cortex, while stoned, than you ever had in yours in your lifetime. As such, you are hereby awarded

That is all.