Reasons I don’t need a Wii, a Pederast named Jesus, and other thoughts…

The Dude: Fuckin’ Quintana… that creep can roll, man.
Walter Sobchak: Yeah, but he’s a pervert, Dude.
The Dude: Yeah.
Walter Sobchak: No, he’s a sex offender. With a record. He served 6 months in Chino for exposing himself to an eight year old.
The Dude: Oh!
Walter Sobchak: When he moved to Hollywood he had to go door to door to tell everyone he was a pederast.
Donny: What’s a… pederast, Walter?
Walter Sobchak: Shut the fuck up, Donny.

Nobody fucks with the Jesus. Well, except that fictional eight year old alluded to in The Big Lebowski. But this is not Jesus’s nor the eight year old’s story.

It’s mine.

You know, there’s something to be said about not working in your field of choice. And that employment path is not by choice, but by necessity. And with the current economic climate, real, tangiable alternatives to my current employer are few and far between. But they are there, and hopefully a change is in the works for me very shortly.

As film work is my field of choice, and understanding the nature of the beast of my career path of choice, one can very easily see my disdain for corporate America. I really do wish there were more companies out there that were progressive, that worked both to do well today AND in the future, not mortgaging the future just to show black on the balance sheet today. To run a business in the opposite fashion Pat Quinn ran a hockey team which he was the General Manager would be a reasonable analogy for this. Quinn’s a good coach, but a shitty GM.

Well, work has gotten worse and worse lately. It seems my ‘resolution’ to post daily (or near daily) has fallen by the wayside. The management dictum at work is increasingly dehumanising, and it’s taking a toll both on me personally (high stress levels and higher risk of migraines), as well as physically (as it is becoming more painful to walk, as the physical nature of my work is taking it’s toll on my already damaged knees). I can only hold onto hope that my overall career path will turn the corner, as currently my condition of employment has been all but verified by the powers that be as one of a dead end job. Hope can only hold for so long through a long phase of erosion. Never fear though, faithful reader. Hope still exists, and a practicum is following.

As for my sanity, I am further thankful I recently purchased an iPhone. Not only is it a phone. And text messaging. iPod. Mobile internet. Day planner. Contact book. Road Map. Camera and photo album. Scientific Calculator. Notepad. Clock.

It’s also a portable Wii. I shit you not. I’m sure we’ve seen those ads for iPhone/iPod touch where there are games controlled by wobbling the iPhone. Well, a few nights ago, I trumped the light sabre application. I downloaded iBowl. You actually swing the phone like you would roll a 10-pin bowling ball. Fuck me running. I’ve become instantly addicted to iBowl. Further more, I have some moderate form of stress relief. To make it perfect, I just need two things. A white russian (can someone get me Jay Janower’s number already), and a child rapist named Jesus so I can consistently kick his ass.

Interdum vos ut volvo ferrus six.

30 days of pre-vis

With all the facucta nonsesne in my ‘Golden World’ lately, mostly surrounding misreading friends who stab you in the back, and of course the nonsense going on at work with really petty superiors, it becomes easy to lose focus. I did not come out here to NOT work in film. I did not leave family and friends behind NOT to find any new, real friends. But, through the crap, sometimes it’s very hard to lose sight of what’s important.

Being a filmie, there starts to become a very simple way regain focus. Pre-vis. Or, for those NOT in the know (Todd this category always seems to revolve around you) pre-visualization. In filmic terms, storyboarding, animatics, and roughly shot video footage fall in this category. It helps bridge the gap from imagination to tangiability.

Like the next month. Ughh. It’s gonna be hell. Work is the worst in the upcoming month. But one month from now, less one day, I will be here. And to ease the next month, to bridge the gap I will endure, I had to do the following pre-visualizational technique:

My Gods, I make this look good!

That is all.

Beginning in a new direction

That is all.

No Sunlight Today

Arrive at work before the sun rises, leave after it sets… you know, if I didn’t actually drive for my job, I’d never see the sun until April or so. Not that the sun makes any appearences through the perpetual Vancouver rain clouds.

Which got me thinking about reality programming, funnily enough. Now for me, film school grad and classically educated man, thinks of one thing with reality. Documentary. And not Michael Moore style. Cinema verite. Watch 9-11 or Salesman to get what I mean.

But still, for ‘reality based’ series, there are a few winners. Gene Simmons Family Jewels, Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares (UK), and Hell’s Kitchen to name a few. But none top…

13 straight episodes of Kenny Hotz kicking the shit out of Spencer Nolan Rice, season 4 premiering tonight (in ten minutes, better hurry). Even our differently brained neighbours get the shows now (I think on Comedy Central, though I’m not sure and too lazy to Google it at the moment). Mind you, they’re further edited for language and offensive content, so the best they get is Kenny vs. Spenny light (which is akin to season 1, funnily enough).

As for an outside guess, I say Kenny takes an easy 10 competitions this year. But honestly, how much fight can you get from a punching bag anyway?

That is all.

Get rid of that Yankee scrip

For years, visiting our differently brained neighbours to the south, I always remember how Yanks cringed about Canadian currency. Border town stores never wanted to accept it. Vending machines were actually programmed to respond to the slight differences between Canadian and American coins as to stop tourists (such as myself) trying to use a Canadian coin or two to make up the difference to buy a Coke.

Now, the shoe is on the other foot. American currency is weaker than Canadian for the first time in around thirty years. The irony of it all is that in my industry of choice (read NOT the day job) thrives on a weak Canadian dollar. To cut to the chase, American productions get more bang for the buck on the exchange. Well, no longer. Not surprising that it’s been right slow for us film techies this year.

On top of my obvious career concerns (though I harbour desires to foster more indigenous productions to eliminate our dependency on Hollywood’s northern productions … and who needs yet ANOTHER remake of King Kong anyway?), I do find these interesting points to be raised:

Will the NHLPA re-negotiate so that players can now be payed in stronger, Canadian currency? And will more Canadian born players be lured back to Canadian clubs? And most importantly, will the USA relinquish their enslavement of les Nordiques and the Jets?

When will Chapters start honouring the US listed prices as they soon realize that all their customers are making a run for the border to buy the same products at a great discount?

When will the Peso overtake the US dollar in terms of exchange strength?

Will the big three move permanently to Windsor while suppliers like Magna head south?

But most importantly… and scary because he’s dumb enough…

When will Dubya consider this strength a Canadian act of terrorism against the American way of life?

But until them, put all American currency where it belongs. In the bin. No better than cheap rubbish.

That is all.